Have you ever wanted to be a hip hop superstar, but lacked the bling, gold teeth and thug life attitude to do it? Then fear not! Because 50 Cent: Bulletproof might just be the game you’re looking for. Unless, you know, you don’t want to be a hip hop superstar. If that’s the case then you’re better off playing Tetris or something that’s not likely to get your pulse going.
After being shot up and left for dead, Fiddy, as he’s known to his friends, kills and maims loads of bad guys on his quest for revenge. Helped by Eminem (aka bent cop McVicar) and the G-Unit, he discovers chairs facing beds, huge wads of cash lying around, and the strange dead eyed stare of comrades and enemies alike. Is there hidden symbolism behind all of this? Nobody knows for sure.
But what about the game itself? Aiming is slow and awkward, with you pumping more bullets into the scenery than you do at your numerous enemies, and character models are repeated. Again and again and again.
Objectives are hidden in the menu, which is typical for the era but it means you stop and start more than is necessary, ruining any flow that you try to build. Who wants to stare at a digital replica of a digital smartwatch when there are thugs to kill?
On the positive side, the counter-kills and focus deaths are fun, but they can be quite fiddly to achieve, especially when you have goons (no, not them) shooting at you. Auto lock-on would have been useful. It’s either that or we were just not very good at playing the game. It’s probably the latter.
The story might be solid and gritty, but the poor objective setting and fiddly controls spoil an otherwise solid effort.